Baby Brother Update

Baby Brother has been with us almost three weeks now. I would say the adjustment has gone about as planned.

Sleep has been a challenge for him. Naps have been short, and nighttime has felt much like having a newborn in the house. Although he has gone from waking every 2-3 hours to stretches of 4-6 hours over the last few nights.

While adjustment to his new home and family certainly plays a role in his sleep, there are other factors at play as well.

He has reflux and it is bad enough that he requires medication to help with the pain and spit-up. The pediatrician recently upped his dosage and I’ve made some feeding changes that seem to be helping. However, until he outgrows this, it’s obviously going to be an issue for him.

His start in life wasn’t stellar and that may be playing the largest role in his inability to get good sleep.

All of these things we were aware of and accepted. Now it’s a matter of trying to figure out what works best for him and for us.

I was told he is developmentally on target, and this has proven to be true. He wasn’t sitting very well but is now sitting very well on his own. He is able to roll to get to things but is now starting to get his knees up under him. It won’t be long until we have a crawler.

He is becoming quite the talker making lots of sounds as he explores his voice.

Bouncing may be one of his favorite things to do. He is showing signs of being a very active little boy who will keep us on our toes.

Since he arrived, he has gone from having two teeth to six. This may also be a likely reason he hasn’t slept well.

While he certainly grieved the loss of his foster family, he has adjusted well. He shows very good signs of attachment and bonding, especially to me. Because hubby works all day and doesn’t have the opportunity to spend as much time with him as the girls and I do, he only wants dad when he’s happy and playful. When he is tired or hungry, only mom will do. With time, he’ll discover that we are all here to love him and care for him.

We are lucky to have a foster care specialty clinic in our area that has a wonderful medical staff. Baby Brother had his first appointment with them, and I couldn’t have been more pleased. They have made some referrals to make sure his less than stellar start in life isn’t impacting things like his hearing or eyesight. He has already seen the audiologist and I’m happy to report that his hearing is fine. He now has an appointment to have his vision checked. While I don’t have any concerns, his rough start in life puts him at higher risk for some potential problems.

Life is moving along and we’re slowly, but surely, finding a routine that works. It’s going to take us a few months to really settle in, but we’ll get there.

The case went to hearing recently and parental rights were terminated. In Texas, the parent(s) have 30 days to appeal, and family has 90 days. No one is anticipating this will go to appeal, so after the 90 days, the case will be turned over to the adoption unit and we’ll begin the adoption process.

This is such a bittersweet time. On one hand, we’re thrilled that Arryn and Baby Brother will have the opportunity to grow up together. On the other hand, it’s sad to know that like Arryn, he will be separated from his bio family. With time, we hope things will change and we can develop on going relationships.

For now, we continue to focus on our family and trying to enjoy each moment with Baby Brother. Even thru the sleepless nights. 🙂


  1. Reflux: grown son has this, had it since birth. He is now in his late 30’s.
    Four or five yrs ago he had some “procedures” that were needed due to the damage and scarring in his esophagus, from the yrs of repeated acid damage to esophagus. His esophagus had narrowed to the point that swallowing of semi solids was painful.
    They put a balloon down, inflate it some, stretching the esophagus. This was done under anesthesia. He had weeks of real pain with swallowing until this heals.
    Slowly, the narrowing will return, procedure will be needed again.
    His statistical risk of esophageal cancer is higher than if he didn’t have this problem. He still has heartburn problems, sensitive gag reflex, has to avoid certain foods that make it worse.
    Just sayin, he may not outgrow it, although the constant spitting up does get better. It’s more like they learn to manage it, and swallow it back, or get to the toilet. Colds with a cough were no fun, a hard cough, and he threw up….he got old enough to run to the toilet. Several of my extended family have this.
    I believe they sometimes do a surgical correction for this. Nobody ever suggested this for my son. If they had, I would have likely said, “no”. At that time, maybe still, it was a “through the sternum” surgery. I did not know the long term possible consequences of this problem then, and did not consider it serious enough for that. I did not know enough to ask questions about it then…..

    • Baby Brother is baby #4 I’ve had with reflux. He is the only one I’ve had that has been on medication though. I know that most outgrow it, but not all. The doctor is monitoring it closely because it can cause serious esophageal problems. I am sorry that your son has had to deal with this for such a long time. I have silent reflux and it can certainly be miserable.

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