Four Years Ago

May 10th, 2010

It was the day after Mother’s Day.  The doorbell rang and when I answered the door I was given the news that our youngest son had died.

This is not an anniversary I celebrate.  Every day I think of my son, but this day I think of him more often.  This is not an easy day to relive, but with each year it becomes a little easier.

Today we took a little day trip.  I’ll share details of our trip in my next blog post, but our day away made me smile.  I suppose the day gave me a different perspective.  It gave me the ability to look at life and our son’s death differently somehow.

Although I miss him every day, my memories of his life are less tearful now and maybe the key to getting thru May 10th is to spend the day with the people I love, doing something that truly makes us happy.  After all, I think he would only want us to be happy.

Ben August , 1988- May 10, 2010
August 4, 1988- May 10, 2010


  1. This is so sad. I’m sure there will always be a little sadness, but in time you will find it easier to rejoice and celebrate his sort life. Wishing you courage and blessings always. Laura

    • Yes, there is always some sadness. It’s not something a parent should have to endure, yet time does have a way of healing. The raw edges scarring over with each year that passes. Slowly, the tears turn to smiles as I remember the good times spent with our son.

  2. Thank you Katie! It is never an easy anniversary, but somehow this year felt different. Whether it was our visit to the farm, time or a combination of both these things, I don’t know. I just know it was easier and I was able to celebrate life. Both the life we live now and life my son lived.

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